Yippee Ki Y- Oh, Who Cares Anymore?

Directed by John Moore, written by Skip Woods, starring Bruce Willis, Jai Courtney, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, and Cole Hauser - Rated R

 

The Die Hard franchise has been ripe for parody since the first sequel.  After Bruce Willis, as Detective John McClane, wondered in Die Hard 2, “How can the same [thing] happen to the same guy twice?” it was obvious that the audience should accept the ridiculousness of the franchise and just go with it.  I’m okay with that, but I have a couple issues.  First, you shouldn’t necessarily take any advice that comes from the script of Die Hard 2.  Second, and most important, John McClane needs to continue to be that “same guy.”  Also, how unfortunate is it that the sketch from “The Ben Stiller Show” called “Die Hard 12” is starting to seem like a possibility?  (Haven’t seen that sketch?  Watch it now.)

 

Yes, Bruce Willis is still cast as John McClane in A Good Day to Die Hard (I would prefer something less stupid for a title, by the way, like Die the Most Hardest or something), but he is a mere shadow of himself.  Willis’s portrayal of McClane is what makes these films great.  His exasperated tone, his quick wit, and his laughter as he takes a beating.  That stuff sort of exists in this film, but it seems so forced that it doesn’t matter.  Not to mention McClane has changed over the years.  He went from a reluctant hero forced into a situation he wants to avoid into a kill-crazy vigilante who rushes into violent situations for little or no reason. 

 

Perhaps it’s the setting.  Moving John McClane to Russia just seems wrong.  For starters, this isn’t 1985 and McClane isn’t Rocky.  This plotline about Chernobyl and nuclear weapons would have felt lazy in the first Die Hard film, much less the fifth one.  The story felt more at home in a direct-to-video Jean-Claude Van Damme movie.  Wait…is this the plot to one of the Universal Soldier DTV sequels?  (Sadly, I’m not joking.  Check out Universal Soldier: Regeneration if you don’t believe me.) 

 

So the setting sucks.  There’s still a slightly interesting bad guy for McClane to banter with, right?  Nope.  The villain is vague to the point that I couldn’t tell which plain, middle-aged Russian man was “good” and which was “bad.”  Maybe that’s the point, but it made for a lame story.  McClane does cross paths with a dancing bad guy at one point, but their banter is more head-scratching than knee-slapping. 

 

But there must be a sidekick along for the ride, right?  Die Hard With a Vengeance set the bar high with the tumultuous team-up with Samuel L. Jackson, and Live Free or Die Hard gave us the timely and surprisingly amusing duo of Willis and Justin Long.  Good Day introduces the barely talked about son of John McClane played by Jai Courtney.  Courtney previously played a thug in Jack Reacher, and that’s pretty much all he’s good for at the moment.  There is just nothing interesting about this guy, whether that’s a character or acting fault is irrelevant.  I didn’t want to see these two teaming up for anything, especially since the new character is barely established and we’re given almost no explanation for their hatred for one another aside from the fact that it must be hard to be the kid of an action hero. 

 

The upset kid dynamic just makes no sense for a film like this.  The audience has almost no knowledge of this son character, so we’re with McClane all the way.  We’ve been through four movies with this character, so if we’re taking a side, guess which one we’re going with?  On top of that, we don’t know specifically what McClane did to upset the kid, so the son comes off as an ungrateful jerk.  Who thought it was a good idea to try to get the audience to hate the main character for being a dead beat dad?  I hope this duo isn’t the future of the franchise.  Actually, after this, I’m not sure I want a future for this franchise.

 

All of these major elements aside, this is still Die Hard, and that name has become synonymous with crazy action (whether or not that’s a good thing is beside the point now).  If the action holds up, then this film could be barely worth a watch.  The action is…crazy, sure, but it doesn’t save the film.  So much of it seemed like it was pointlessly trying to be insane.  Did you hate the sight of McClane on a fighter jet during the last film?  Then you won’t care for this one at all.  As for the style of it, I didn’t know what to think once it was over.  There were so many strange, extreme slo-mo moments.  Slow motion explosions?  How is that impressive?  And who wants to see two people falling in slow motion for what seems like five minutes?  Upon research, I found that director John Moore had also made the abysmal Max Payne, and then it all made sense. 

 

After all of this bashing, though, I can’t tell the die hard (pun totally intended) fans to skip this one.  It’s still Bruce Willis and he’s still John McClane, kind of.  Some fans are bound to like it.  I really wanted to, but I can’t ignore the utter disappoint I felt walking out of the theater.  If you’re on the fence, maybe this will help you: I am now going to re-watch Die Hard 2 because I think I might like that sequel more than this.  If you’re the same type of fan as I am, then that should tell you how much I disliked this movie.  Watch at your own risk.

"Scott Pilgrim vs. the World"

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World - Directed by Edgar Wright, written by Michael Bacall and Edgar Wright, starring Michael Cera, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Kieran Culkin, Chris Evans, and Jason Schwartzman - Rated PG-13

This movie isn't for everyone, but it's definitely for me.

Here’s the deal: I saw Scott Pilgrim vs. the World nearly a week after its release. I know it bombed (or at least it didn’t exactly tear up the box office), and I am aware that many critics, especially those of the online persuasion, sang its praises as loud as they could.

Now, with all that out of the way, allow me to fall in line with all the rest. I loved every minute of this film. It was dork heaven. I knew from the very beginning that this film was made for me. Instead of the traditional Universal Studios intro, there is an 8-bit videogame version of the logo with retro videogame music to match. In a word: awesome.

Before I really get into why I love this movie so much, I will acknowledge that this film is not for everyone. In fact, it’s not for most people. First, it’s based on a series of graphic novels. I loved the graphic novels (even if I only read them because I heard about the film project), so the realization of the series as a film was its own thrill. Second, it stars Michael Cera, who is becoming one of my favorite comedic actors. Third, it contains numerous old school videogame references. When an enemy is defeated, coins appear. Scott gets a 1-UP at one point. The main characters have a band called Sex Bob-omb, etc. Fourth, this is a comic book adaptation in the truest sense. When a phone rings, “Riiiinnnnnngggggg” shows up on the screen. That kind of thing happens throughout. Fifth, you have to accept that supernatural fights break out every now and then, and none of the characters seem surprised by it.

After reading that, you have one of two reactions. Either you think it sounds like a garbled mess of a movie or it sounds like an amazing entertainment experience. I, of course, fall into the latter of the two.

If you’re still reading, here’s a quick synopsis: Scott Pilgrim (Cera) is a slacker in his early 20s. He’s dating a high school girl, but soon meets Ramona Flowers (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), who is literally the girl of his dreams. He has to juggle being in the midst of a battle of the bands while battling Ramona’s seven evil exes.

Scott Pilgrim is not about plot, though. It’s about the little things. That’s how the comic worked and that’s how the movie works. There are so many moments in this film that work so well in their small doses that I can’t recount them all…but I’ll at least name a few. There’s the vegan police, the “Seinfeld” scene, the music (I highly suggest buying the soundtrack), the awesome fight scenes, there’s a bass battle, etc. Once again, that sounds messy, but it works somehow.

I can see someone watching this and getting completely lost, but I watched it and became completely engrossed in it. The editing is jarring, but in a good way. The cuts create a real comic book feeling (and it was nice to see actual panels from the comic used in the film). An example of that is how quickly the movie goes from one location to the next or from night to day. Director Edgar Wright truly captured the spirit of the books. More impressive, he made the best videogame movie ever…and this isn’t even based on a videogame.

I mention the videogame stuff again because the movie is very much inspired by games. If you’re not an old-school gamer, then a lot of the references and sound effects will be completely lost on you. This is why I don’t plan on recommending this movie to most people. But most of my friends will dig the videogame stuff. My common acquaintances, though, I’ll tell them to skip it…or at least watch at their own risk.

The casting is causing an issue as well. Some people out there just hate Michael Cera. Obviously, I am not one of those people. I still think if people check out Youth in Revolt they’ll see that Cera has some chops and isn’t a one-note actor. Scott Pilgrim is another example of his acting ability. He isn’t playing the whiny, dry-humored virgin in this one. In fact, he plays an oblivious, grinning idiot, which is a stretch for him. He completely pulls it off, too. There are moments in this film when he just stares into space with a stupid grin on his face and it is hilarious. I hate to say it, though, but this movie isn’t going to change anyone’s mind about the guy. If you hate Cera, you just hate him. There’s no getting around it, I guess. If your only reason for avoiding this film is Cera, however, I am pleading with you: put aside your hatred of him and give the movie a chance.

The supporting cast backs up Cera quite nicely. Winstead has a kind of beauty that I can’t put my finger on, and she plays cool so well. I can completely understand why Pilgrim falls for her. Kieran Culkin stands out as Scott’s witty roommate. Chris Evans is very funny as the bad actor ex-boyfriend of Ramona. His gruff voice is amusing alone. Brandon Routh (the latest Superman) is surprisingly hilarious as a psychic vegan. And Jason Schwartzman is perfect as Gideon Graves, the most evil of all the evil exes. To be honest, I could just list the entire supporting cast because they all work so well. Perhaps this is just the graphic novel fan coming out in me, but I felt that every actor embodied their comic counterpart.

Now’s the time I’m supposed to tell you what’s wrong with Scott Pilgrim, but I have nothing for you. What some might find messy, I find brilliantly disheveled. The action that some may find outlandish, I found surprisingly well filmed. The music that some may find grating, I found humorous and catchy. I’ll say it again: This film was made for me.